11 Signs You Are in a Toxic Relationship

11 Signs You Are in a Toxic Relationship

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Sometimes it is hard to detect the toxic relationship signs when you are in a relationship. It is easier to believe, no matter what you are going to feel cared for, and loved in a relationship.

Due to that illusion, the toxic relationship signs can go amiss, or people may deliberately ignore them because that is the easier option than letting go. Being in a toxic relationship with someone is a proper mental turmoil, as you always feel somehow on edge but tend to ignore it.

Relationships go through, certain ups and downs; sometimes they last other times they end horribly. Someone with a mature, healthy mind set can find himself/herself trapped with a toxic person.

The toxic relationship signs aren’t clearly visible in the beginning, but slowly as the illusions of the person break down, the toxic relationship signs start to become visible.

Relationships can start to feel toxic after some years, if not immediately. As the relationship starts to have more negative behaviors instead of positive ones, it is noticeable when it is emotionally draining, and you feel like your feeling isn’t validated.

Without noticing, you start placing your partner before you, and he/she starts manipulating you in thinking that you shouldn’t place yourself before them. Listed below are the toxic relationship signs that you need to look into to detect whether you are not in a toxic relationship.

 

Being on the Edge

If your partner is over controlling, the relationship is immediately going to go downhill. You always have to stay on edge, being cautious of what you say, what you do, in order to not face an outburst from your partner.

Such passive aggressive behavior can turn toxic where there’s no accountability or confrontation. Once you start to think there is no point talking problems out with your partner, because he/she doesn’t have a listening ear, then you need to reconsider the relationship.

If you feel threatened or scared to fully express your thoughts with your partner, then it’s a sign that the relationship isn’t meant to be. If your partner feels happy by walking all over you, then it’s a sign you need to go.

 

Constantly Fighting

The most common sign to detect in a toxic relationship is that you are always fighting; there is no communication, even during, or after, the argument. Fighting in a relationship isn’t necessarily bad. But if there is no direct acceptance of one’s mistake afterwards or a solution to end the fight, then it will lead to more grudges and conflict.

In a healthy relationship, as time passes, understanding between the two people should gradually increase, instead of leading towards more misunderstanding. If you are always afraid to talk about what hurts you, or what is bothering you without proper communication, then how do you expect the relationship to progress?

So, if you start to feel personally attacked during each fight, then nothing will improve.

 

Expecting Change Behavior

It can be hard to accept the toxic traits in your partner and leaving them for it. As a result, you end up anticipating some change in behavior and giving them chances of changing their toxic behavior. But it seems that hardly ever happens.

Not only expecting changed behavior turns toxic, but it can also be emotionally draining. You start to strip away your partner’s individuality by expecting them to behave like you want them to. Each person can make his/her own conscious choices, if you try to strip their habits away from them, it can go downhill.

It’s hard to accept that despite the few positive aspects of the relationship, it’s not obligatory for you to stay. If your partner always shuts you down whenever you try to address a problem, and hoping they wouldn’t do that the next time – then you need to stop harboring a toxic relationship.

Therefore, it’s better to accept even with your blind vision for your partner, which they are never going to change.

 

Placing no Effort in the Relationship

When you believe you are the only one who puts effort into the relationship, don’t dismiss that feeling. Chances are your intuition is correct. If you constantly feel like that, then it can get mentally, emotionally, and physically draining to be with such a person.

You can notice these notice when your partner fails to give you time, fails to take responsibility for his/her actions, fails to change his/her destructive behavior, and stops sharing things with you. Because then the relationship turns one sided and there’s no point to drag such a relationship where you’re the only one giving.

Instead of feeling comfortable in their presence, you start to feel frustrated or annoyed. It is not your responsibility to make things right each time when something is wrong. Such a relationship can start to make you question your worth when you are capable of so much more.

 

Barrier in a Relationship

The most prominent toxic trait that you can notice in your partner is when they start stonewalling you. What does that mean? Fighting in a relationship isn’t necessarily bad, but when the fight comes to no resolution, and then it can be a problem.

Similarly, if you are bothered by something and your partner fails to address the problem even when you have confronted them, which means he/she is stonewalling you. It happens every time you try to confront them with an issue, they either give no response, or they simply ignore it.

Even though it hard to accept, but if your partner ghosts on you or makes no effort to fix a problem, then you need to accept that you are in a toxic relationship. It is easier to manipulate a person thinking they are always going to be around no matter what they act, but it’s up to you to stand up for yourself.

Communication is a must to maintain a healthy relationship. Listening to issues with your partner is a must. So is coming together to a solution, without offending each other personally.

 

You feel unhappy

One of the toxic relationships signs is that you don’t feel happy anymore. Of course, it is not possible to be happy all the time in a relationship. But when it leads to questioning your self-worth, uncared, unloved for, it starts to make you feel down. You can feel the energy escaping from your body, and it can have a huge mental and physical impact on your health.

A relationship that doesn’t last always end up leaving people severely depressed because they end up thinking there was something wrong with them. If they don’t make you feel like they have your back, in every step of the way, then is it worth being in that relationship?

 

Keeping Score

In a relationship, the most destructive thing can be to keep grudges. Instead of acting like an adult, and confronting your mistake, your partner ends up winding out grudges to end the argument.

Not only can this be emotionally draining, but you end up losing interest in fighting for that person. Every person is capable of making numerous mistakes, saying the wrong things when you’re angry, but very few tend to admit they have done wrong.

The appropriate action to take is to forgive your partner for their mistakes. Instead of, bringing them up each time you two are arguing. Your partner not only projects their own mistake on you but also makes you feel responsible for something they have done.

So this is a notable toxic trait in a relationship: avoiding present issue by bringing up mistakes from the past.

 

Making Excuses for their Behavior

When you are in a relationship, you often tend to ignore the toxic relationship signs that your partner isn’t treating you right. When you know you deserve better than this, yet, you still conform to how it is, because that’s the easier way out. If your partner fails to empathize with you, support you, make time for you, then it’s a blatant problem.

And if you end up making excuses for their behavior by telling yourself it’s because they are busy with work or something, then you are keeping yourself in denial. No relationship can progress if your partner fails to acknowledge and address their mistakes, and you can’t always make excuses for their behavior.

 

Power Games

When you are in a toxic relationship it constantly feels like you and your partner in a competition. Your partner berates you or makes you feel bad about your accomplishment.

So, if your partner makes you feel like you don’t have the power to voice your problems, you need to end the relationship. Therefore, instead of feeling, you are equals, you feel like a separate individual when you are with them.

 

Not Seeing the Point of Trying

When you are unhappy, see no change in behavior, see no effort, you start to gradually see no point in trying to keep such a relationship. If you feel comfortable in someone’s presence, you are going to want to stay with them. When someone’s presence starts to make no difference in your life, you are going to begin looking for ways to escape.

There is no point keeping yourself in a fantasy thinking some miracle will happen and will be fine, but no that hardly ever happens. So it’s better to think for yourself.

 

Their Presence Makes You Feel Worse

Not feeling like you can be yourself with your partner or feeling worse in their presence is another noticeable toxic trait you need to acknowledge. Instead of constantly wanting to be with each other, you don’t look to meeting them. Whether it’s because they fail to give you attention or make you feel insecure about yourself, so you start to feel worse.

When that starts to happen, you stop being yourself around your partner. And this is a clear toxic relationship sign.

How to cope when you’re in a Toxic Relationship?

Being in a toxic relationship does not mean that either of you is toxic, but sometimes the way you and your partner interact can bring out the worst sides in either of you. You can cope with a toxic relationship, by acknowledging your toxic traits and try to work towards improving them.

Discussing the present problems, listening to understand and not to find fault, these are the small steps that can make a huge difference.

If you think someone’s presence makes you uncomfortable, then you need to stop hanging out with that person. The easiest way to tackle a toxic relationship is to place yourself first.

When you learn to place yourself first, you stop allowing people to walk all over you. You learn to care for yourself when the other person doesn’t care for you, and most importantly, you don’t let the other person question your self-worth.

Because losing your health, your energy over someone who fails to make any changes in his behavior is emotionally and physically draining. So you should learn to always place yourself first.

 

Conclusion

When you don’t want to lose a relationship, you try your best to somehow make it work. If your attempts are futile, and your partner shows no interest in saving the relationship, then you need to consider ending the relationship.

The warning signs in a toxic relationship start to show gradually, even if you try your best to ignore them, they keep getting worse. Because you are in return encouraging someone’s behavior, instead of correcting it.

The visible toxic relationship signs are that you start to feel worn out, suffocated, and powerless. When your partner stops to communicate their problems with you, or starts disrespecting you and feels no regret for it, then that’s a visible toxic relationship sign.

A lot of people feel like they are not treated right in a relationship, so it’s important you ask yourself whether you will stand for yourself or not.

 

11 Signs You're in a Toxic Relationship

 

Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

 

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4 thoughts on “11 Signs You Are in a Toxic Relationship”

  1. I was in a toxic relationship and funnily it was my longest relationship. We should have separated 1 year into it, but the second year I fell pregnant and I was caught up in his life and his family were no different. I became very ill. I am now MANY years later engaged to my “best friend” we met and have only been together for a year, but this relationship has not one ounce of toxicity, I wish I saw the signs or at least had the courage to face the signs. This blog post is good for people caught in that type of predicament.

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