Have you ever wondered why long distance relationships fail? Long distance relationships can be both a blessing and a curse. Essentially you’ve found someone incredible.
Someone who makes you happy, but you have to travel miles upon miles just to meet them. So, it is quite fair to say that long distance relationships aren’t for everyone. This type of relationship tests even the strongest of bonds. There is a lot that both the involved parties need to do to make their long distance relationship work.
So, it is an understatement if all we say is that all one needs is commitment for it to work. If you’re wondering what factors lead to failure, then you’ve come to the right place. Here are 9 reasons why long distance relationships fail.
This is definitely one of the most major reasons why long distance relationships fail. If you or your partner have any strong insecurities, then they are sure to lead to some kind of trouble.
So, what are strong insecurities when it comes to relationships? Having strong insecurities means that you lack the confidence you need to trust your significant other. If you don’t have the confidence to trust your partner, you automatically lose your relationship.
Well, this is essentially true for any kind of relationship. However, when it comes to long distance relationships, the impact is much worse. In long distance relationships, your partner isn’t near you. So, it can become very hard to sort out issues that stem from these insecurities. So, think of having strong insecurities, that lead to trust issues, like a ticking time bomb.
Lack Of Emotional Maturity
A large majority of relationships don’t start off as something serious. This is why, in the beginning, you can’t really tell if you or your partner lack emotional maturity. Sometimes, you or your partner just aren’t ready to enter into a long distance relationship.
So, if you’re not ready, then it’s fair to assume that you lack the emotional maturity that you will need. This means that you won’t be ready to handle most of the issues that you will face in a long distance relationship.
There are numerous unpredictable and complex misunderstandings that you can face simply because of the nature of long distance relationships. These misunderstandings can only be solved if both of you are emotionally mature enough.
However, if there is a lack of emotional maturity, then these unresolved issues will pile on until someone can’t take any more. So, a lack of emotional maturity is one of the chief reasons why long distance relationships fail.
Trying To Maintain Communication On A Regular Basis Can Start To Feel Like A Chore
This reason why long distance relationships fail is one of the most commonly found ones. It is also one of the saddest ones too. Imagine a couple finds out that their relationship will be turning into a long distance relationship. So, they plan and set up a communication schedule that involves communication on a regular basis.
Morning messages, communication throughout the day, and finish that off with a call before you sleep. Sure, this works out for the first few months. However, once both of you start to settle into your own routines, maintaining communication can become hard.
Therefore, sticking to the schedule, just for the sake of regular communication, can start to feel like a chore. This can lead to a growing sense of animosity, either for this schedule itself or even for your partner who may not be able to stick to the schedule. Once you feel as if communication has become a chore, your relationship’s spark can start to dim down to the point where the relationship is essentially over.
We understand that it hurts to even read this scenario. So, here’s a solution. Don’t hold your partner hostage when it comes to sticking to this schedule, particularly if they miss out on hanging out with their friends just so the both of you can talk.
Dealing With Different Schedules Can Become Exhausting
It honestly seems as if people who are involved in long distance relationships can’t win. How so? Well, even if you enjoy communicating with your partner, dealing with different schedules or even timezones can become very tiring. This is another common reason why long distance relationships fail. Once you’re dealing with different timezones or schedules, it becomes naturally hard to find consistent time for your partner.
This can lead to a huge decrease in the time that you can give to your partner. It also means that your mind will also be preoccupied with other tasks that you have to do later on, during your time of communication. What does that lead to?
You guessed it; hostility and emotional disparities. It also leads to disagreements and even resentment. It is also worth noting that this reason why long distance relationships fail especially impacts those relationships in which one is more social than the other.
Increasing Financial Strains
Like any relationship, those who are involved in a long distance relationship also have a need to spend time together. A time that they don’t just spend together in the virtual world. Going on dates, being intimate, and more, are truly the biggest joys when it comes to long distance relationships. However, in a long distance relationship, there is, well, a long distance between the two who are involved.
This is why it is much harder to meet when one is in a long distance relationship. Particularly for those who live in separate countries. Honestly, it is also hard to consistently meet your partner who lives in a different city in the same country. Even though the time they spend together is much more meaningful, it isn’t without financial strains.
This issue can also lead to disagreements on several topics, such as who should come to visit the other. So, there is no doubt that an increasing financial strain is a common reason why long distance relationships fail.
Being Unable To Admit Your Mistakes
This is one reason behind the failure of countless relationships, but when it comes to long distance relationships, you know that it’s much more impactful. It’s one of the fastest reasons why long distance relationships fail.
If you or your partner is someone who doesn’t believe in apologies then that is just a recipe for disaster. Not being able to admit your mistakes means that you’ll be unable to resolve the issues that come between you and your partner. This also means that, by not admitting your mistakes, you’ll be hurting your partner much more than the original argument did. That is the case with any type of relationship.
So, why is it much more impactful when it comes to long distance relationships? Well, naturally, in a long distance relationship, there tend to be a lot more fights than usual. Not to mention that most of these fights are on some of the most trivial topics as well. However, since you aren’t physically available to make your partner better, all you can do is apologize.
Now imagine if the person at fault doesn’t believe in apologies? That is truly a recipe for disaster. If you don’t believe in the only way in which you can make something better, then your relationship will end. The growing resentment will reach a point where the other person won’t be able to take anymore. This is truly one of the most painful reasons why long distance relationships fail.
Lack Of Self Love And Low Self Esteem
This is an issue that has led to countless heartbreaks, it is still manageable when it comes to traditional relationships. The issue arises when someone in a long distance relationship has a lack of self-love and low self-esteem issues. So, what do these issues look like in a long distance relationship?
Someone who suffers from these issues will always feel as if anything that goes wrong in their relationship is their fault. They will also see the worst in themselves. This could go to the point where it becomes very harmful in a long distance relationship.
Now, both of these issues are still manageable in a long distance relationship, especially if you have a supportive partner. However, in most cases, someone who suffers from both issues is highly likely to give up on the relationship. This can be the result of the smallest and slightest of triggers. This is why this is also one of the fastest reasons why long distance relationships fail.
No Feelings Of Genuine Love
What makes someone try their absolute hardest in a relationship? Love, of course. So, if you know that you’ve found someone who you love and want to spend your life with, you’re sure to do everything to make it work.
This is the case even when it comes to long distance relationships. If you genuinely love someone, you try your best to make it work. However, if you never felt genuine love towards your partner then, you’re more likely to give up or remain indifferent to the difficulties that emerge in a long distance relationship.
There are two ways in which this can play out. Your partner can, either notice this and break off the relationship or you, yourself, might break it off. Surprisingly, this is one of the most common reasons why long distance relationships fail. Most people will enter into a relationship that then transforms into a long distance relationship. So, naturally, they just give up in the beginning or let the two scenarios play out.
Being Too Impatient
One of the most important traits that you need to have if you’re in a long distance relationship is patience. Well, being patient in all aspects of your life is, of course, rewarding. However, when it comes to long distance relationships, being patient is what will help you through it all.
It comes as no surprise that there are likely to be more fights in a long distance relationship. To deal with all of that chaos, what does one need? Patience, of course. The most major reason why you need to be patient in a long distance relationship is that you are unable to meet or even see your partner for days. That can go on for weeks, maybe even months. Being able to handle that requires a lot of patience.
Now, someone who is impatient, particularly in a long distance relationship will surely cause trouble. It can even lead to trivial fights where one might get angry because the other took too long to pick up their call.
While that does sound like something you would laugh on, it does happen. This is why it comes as no shock that being impatient is on the list of why long distance relationships fail. Patience is one of the most important traits to have when you’re entering into a long distance relationship. Without it, there will arise issues that could become too much to handle for the other person.
There is no doubt that the ending of a relationship is pretty much tough for both you and your partner. So, it is fair to assume that the ending of a long distance relationship is tough too. What’s important to note is that it is difficult for both people. This is why it is important for everyone who is entering into a long distance relationship to be mindful of all of the above-mentioned reasons.
It is important for us to trust the person we are involved with. We should not only love the other person but ourselves as well. That is how you can be sure that you’ll be able to bring out the best in yourself and your significant other. It is important for you to be patient, secure, and supportive. Navigating through a long distance relationship, that too, for the first time, can be a hard task for anyone. This is why it is important for you to always stay true to yourself and to your partner.
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Jeremy Park, the founder of jeremylife.com, is a love and relationships expert. With a journalism degree and years of exploration, he offers valuable insights to help you live your best love life. His mission is to make the journey enjoyable and effortless.